Seven Simple Steps to Get Good at Anything
Simple, but not easy
Beginnings are full of hope. Every January 1, millions of people make New Year's resolutions. Every spring, wannabe hobbits start new gardens. Every fall, students begin new majors.
But actually finishing? That’s a lot harder. We get tired. We get bored. We start chasing a new shiny squirrel.
While I am a huge advocate of focusing on the process, the product does still matter. We have to complete that work project, write that paper, finish painting the kitchen. When we finish things, there's a satisfaction and sigh of relief that doesn't happen when we are just starting something.
And when we finish something, we've started moving down the path to getting good at that thing.
Seven
Here are the seven simple steps to get good at anything:
Try something new.
Be bad at it.
Do it again.
Be less bad at it.
Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you can say, "I'm not so bad at this."
Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you can say, "I'm pretty good at this."
Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you can say, "I'm really good at this!"
That's it? Yes, that's it.
This is simple, but it isn't easy to make it through all seven steps. Most people stop at Step 2. They try something for the first time. If it goes badly, they often think, "I'll never be good at this!" And they give up.
A few make it to Step 4. But along the way, boredom sets in. Or impatience takes over. The goal of getting good at the thing seems so far off in the future, a horizon that will never be reached. Without a strong reason to keep trying, effort fizzles out, and the leap to Step 5 is never made.
Only the courageous make it to Step 7. I don't say that lightly: it takes great courage to keep repeating something that you're bad at and to persevere during the less bad and even more less bad stages. It also takes humility, to keep your chin up despite what may look like constant failure.
I remember the first website I built, eight years or so ago. I used a drag-and-drop site builder. What I made wasn't great, and it wasn't fast. It wasn’t even that pretty. But it was functional, which was all I needed at the time from the site. Since then, I've built 5 or 6 more sites - each better than the previous one. Though I’ve developed website building competency and comfort, I still recently worked with a professional web builder for a makeover of an ecommerce business that my husband and I own. Because of all the experience I gained by being less bad, I was able to have intelligent, technical discussions with our web guy and convey my goals for the site. None of my knowledge was a waste. And soon, I'll teach one of my children how to build a website for her own new business.
This has to happen first
Here's the thing to always remember - leaving aside the prodigies of our world, everyone is bad at something before getting good at it. Once upon a time, you were bad at holding up your head, feeding yourself, walking. Your head flopped over when the person holding you forgot to support it, got food all over yourself (and everything else in the vicinity!), tumbled over - a lot. These were all skills you had to learn. We often take the learning process for granted because it was so long ago, and so many learned things ago. We need to return to that childlike approach to learning, and let go of our embarrassment, self-consciousness, and impatience as we work through the seven steps.
Whether you want to improve a particular job skill, get better at a sport, or take up a new hobby, wrestle up your courage. Bring together a group of trusted friends or colleagues. Work on the thing together. Be willing to be bad at whatever it is in front of each other. You'll likely enjoy the process more, laugh a lot, and deepen those relationships along the way.
Find courage.
Be humble.
Be willing to be less bad.
And the downside of this? Read on.